17
Nov

Best George Carlin Quotes



Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That’s just common sense! (George Carlin)

Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy. (George Carlin)

The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept. (George Carlin)

If you live long enough, sooner or later everybody you know has cancer. (George Carlin)

Soft rock music isn’t rock, and it ain’t music. It’s just soft. (George Carlin)

I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed. (George Carlin)

Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac? (George Carlin)

I never joined the Boy Scouts. I don’t trust any organization that has a handbook. (George Carlin)

Beethoven was so hard of hearing, he thought he was a painter. (George Carlin)

In America, anyone can become president. That’s the problem. (George Carlin)

“One thing leads to another”? Not always. Sometimes one thing leads to the same thing. Ask an addict. (George Carlin)

The future will soon be a thing of the past. (George Carlin)

Bowling is not a sport because you have to rent the shoes. (George Carlin)

The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it. (George Carlin)

If a man smiles all the time, he’s probably selling something that doesn’t work. (George Carlin)

I think I am, therefore, I am. I think. (George Carlin)

If the cops didn’t see it, I didn’t do it! (George Carlin)

I don’t have a fear of heights. I do, however, have a fear of falling from heights. (George Carlin)

I have as much authority as the Pope. I just don’t have as many people who believe it. (George Carlin)

3
Nov

Fidelity quotes



They spoil every romance by trying to make it last forever. ( Oscar Wilde)

Nothing is more noble, nothing more venerable than fidelity. Faithfulness and truth are the most sacred excellences and endowments of the human mind. (Marcus Tullius Cicero)

Fidelity. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed. (Ambrose Bierce)

Be slow to fall into friendship, but when thou art in, continue firm and constant. ( Socrates)

Prosperity asks for fidelity; adversity exacts it. (Seneca)

Fidelity is seven-tenths of business success. ( James Parton)

There are two kinds of fidelity - that of dogs and that of cats; and you gentlemen, have the fidelity of cats who never leave the house. ( Napoleon Bonaparte)

It’s easier to be faithful to a restaurant than it is to a woman. ( Federico Fellini)

It is better to be faithful than famous. (Theodore Roosevelt)

Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose. ( Helen Keller )

Fidelity that is bought with money may be overcome with money. (Seneca)

London is full of women who trust their husbands. One can always recognize them. They look so thoroughly unhappy. (Oscar Wilde)

1
Oct

Time Quotes



Time is free, but it’s priceless. You can’t own it, but you can use it. You can’t keepit, but you can spend it. Once you’ve lost it you can never get it back. ( Harvey MacKay)

What then is time? If no one asks me, I know what it is. If I wish to explain it to him who asks, I do not know. (Saint Augustine)

Life is all about timing… the unreachable becomes reachable, the unavailable become available, the unattainable… attainable. Have the patience, wait it out It’s all about timing. ( Stacey Charter)

The whole life of man is but a point of time; let us enjoy it. (Plutarch )

Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. (proverb)

Everything flows and nothing abides; everything gives way and nothing stays fixed. You cannot step twice into the same river, for other waters and yet others, go flowing on. Time is a child, moving counters in a game; the royal power is a child’s. (Heraclitus)

The time is always right to do what is right. ( Martin Luther King)

Time goes, you say? Ah, no! alas, time stays, we go. (Henry Austin Dobson)

What may be done at any time will be done at no time. (Scottish Proverb)

Time is what we want most, but what we use worst. (William Penn)

Time heals what reason cannot. (Seneca)

Time is the accident of accidents. (Epicurus)

Time cools, time clarifies; no mood can be maintained quite unaltered through the course of hours. (Mark Twain)

Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in. (Henry David Thoreau)

Forever is composed of nows. (Emily Dickinson)

Time and tide wait for no man. A pompous and self-satisfied proverb, and was true for a billion years; but in our day of electric wires and water-ballast we turn it around: Man waits not for time nor tide. ( (Mark Twain)